Thursday, May 25, 2006

Mencari Cinta & Dicari Cinta...

Hmmmm....

Before I proceed, another mental note for myself :

PLEASE MEMORIZE YOU USERNAME & PASSWORD...!!!

Finally, after 3 training classes is 5 weeks, I managed to have some time and space to relax a bit. Although I still have another class to go and have to prepare for presentation for the conference that I attend last February (scroll to previous posts). Nothing much about the training. It's the exam is the real deal. So it means I have to prepare for sit for 4 exams. Lucky for me, the date is totally depends on me.



Surfing around few bloggers and xangan, managed to 'accidentally' visit a friend's (during university) blog. Talking and ramblling about love stuff. He found a girl during the university, but I guess they are not meant to be togerther. Right now, that girl are preparing for weedding ceremony and a friend of mine is thinking what could have been 'if' and only if' things are according to his way. Be tough bro! Life goes on. You have a bright future waiting for you, and don't distract your mind with this issue.

Talking about ex that are getting married. I guess many of us have that kind of experience before. Same with me. I found a nice girl when I was 14 (yes... I said 14!). Same age with me. We met at the dinner held by our schools. She's a nice-looking girl and has a great attitude towards her life. Then I asked her 2 years later if she gonna be my girl, and she said 'yes' on 00:00:00 1 January 1995. Yes, it's a New Year and we were only 16. Of course, just like any other couple, it's like a heaven. We were going here and there, dating etc etc. but only lasted for 4 months. We realized that it's too soon and not sure if we can cope with the pressure of being a couple and at the same time, trying to concentrate on SPM (1996). So we broke up but still maintain friendship. We went out several times, met her mother and siblings (never met her father, not because of scary, but maybe I never meant to meet him I guess!). Pretty much like a couple. That is... until I received a phone call from her in 2002...

"Can you give me you home address because I want to send you an invitation to my wedding..."

All hell break loose at that time I guess. Coz she does mention about her fiancee soon-to-be about a year before that, but didn't say anything about getting engaged (i.e when). And at that moment, I was trying my best to stay calm and just asked about when, where etc etc. Of course la, kena le control macho sikit...!!! But when I went back to the campus ( I was at home at that time), I tried my best to cry coz people said when you do, you would feel a bit better. I try to cry... yet I couldn't. I just sat in my room, listening to Dayang Nurfaizah's 'Seandainya Masih Ada Cinta' (jiwang abdul karatz! kantoi....!!!) and thinking, accompanied with Marlboro's 20'. I even skipped the class during that day coz I couldn't concentrate. But I told myself to be strong and move on. But I didn't attend the wedding ceremony coz I have exams. But I think, even if exam is not around, I couldn't attend it. Too many memories of us when we were together. But finally I realized that things like this happen a lot to many other people. It's not a big deal. The real issue is how are we going to cope with it.

Well, after that, I managed to know a girl during the university time. She's a nice girl and brilliant as well ( at that time I guess je... but I'm quite good in guessing things and people). Keep staring at her (at no particular area of her body though!) during the class for more than a year! Yeah... I'm not really good in making the first move. But in the end, we managed to declare ourselves as a couple... 4 days before the semester starts in June 2002. Well, I guess shit happens... it only lasted for 21 months. Don't want to go into detail here....

Back to the friend of mine, I guess that kind of thing will happen, until you yourself get married or die as a single dude. Yeah, I know. Many of our friends already married and many of them are expecting their first/second/third/fourth (choose where appropriate) . But don't compare too much with them. I mean, if you not ready to get married, then don't do it. Marrying someone is not like you buy something like 7 Eleven's Slurpee (my favourite!) where if you think you don't like it, you can throw your spouse away. Are you going to say something like "Aku tak ready lagi sebenarnya masa nak kahwin aritu..." when people asking you why you and spouse has become a frequent visitor at Jabatan Nikah, Cerai & Rujuk? Nanti orang lain kahwin kumpul anak, kau kumpul peguam syariah...!!!

Well... I guess if you want love, you'll have to find it. None of us gets younger year in, year out. So if you think you are entering the 'desperate zone',already, you should go find your potential other half quickly. If you think you like someone, speak out and ask her /her out for a lunch or dinner or something. Start something. Don't just sit there and hope that person would know what is your feelings towards him/her. I believe, many of them are not mind-reader....

As for me, if you ask me "have you made your move? "... I would say "define what can be considered as the "move" first... then I'll tell you whether or not I have made mine"...

Thehehehehehe....


**EDITED VERSION**

The girl that I knew during university, I was guessing that she's nice and brilliant because we don't know each other yet at that time. After that, I knew that she's ACTUALLY nice and brilliant and cute as well... of course le, that time dah couple, so she must be the cutest living thing on earth...!!! Lagi mau tanya. .. Tau takpe...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

She's a nice girl and brilliant as well ( at that time I guess je....





*ouch*

buzzinhornets said...

Ouch..?

Why lorrr...???